Leon had just come home, opening the door and closing it behind his shoulders: it was late afternoon, almost evening. Buddy, for once, had managed to have a free day while Leon himself had received some special stuffs to do for Stan so he had spent the day running around: not a big deal but he surely had had quite a stressful day and now he sought nothing more than relief some stress in the arms of a certain gnome...
Though when he reached the bedroom, he found himself in front of him the most unexpected and shocking sight. He had known Buddy for roughly 2 years and a half, and they had been together roughly for 2 years... they had even lived together for 1 year now, and Leon could swear he had never witnessed Buddy cry, and it wasn't like he hadn't had reasons! How he had been beat up some times... that wounds would have been able to make a grown up man cry and still and yet, that cocky, sassy grin had never abandoned Buddy's lip.
And now here the gnome was, crying while sitting on the bed, silently shaken by sobs. Leon could feel a cold chill through his spine, an awful sensation, and in no time using his power he was in front of Buddy, barely able to realise himself how worried he actually was, but before he could say anything Buddy, who noticed him only in that moment, tried to cover up his tears, standing up and trying to move quickly away, but Leon was quicker as always and stopped him "What's going on? Are you ok?" the worry was evident in Leon's voice but on the spot Buddy didn't even care and only tried to wriggle away "Fuck off, let me go" the ginger hissed between gritted teeth.
Leon tried to turn him around, only angering Buddy more and making the short ginger try to hit him: Stupid gnome! Why did everything had to turn into a fight with him? He was only worrying for him, couldn't he just let him? The quick fight soon result with Leon pinning Buddy on the bed, preventing him from moving: Buddy could be a stubborn ass, but so was Leon himself and he wasn't let this go. He needed to know.
"What's going on?" Leon repeated slowly, keeping Buddy in place and blocking his arms with his hands. Buddy just looked away, terribly pissed off, but he was obviously unable to stop the tears and Leon could easily guess that he didn't want him to see it. Idiot... When Buddy didn't reply Leon shook him angrily, painfully tugging at his hair: it wasn't like he actually wanted to hurt him but for fuck's sake, Buddy was really making him lose it! "Answer me! What's wrong with you?"
"It's none of your fucking business!" Buddy hissed angrily again, but Leon had no intention to give up and only rolled his eyes in annoyance "It is if it makes you cry like a baby!"
"I'm n-" Buddy started to deny it, but Leon immediately interrupted him
"Please don't even try it! Even your shirt is wet with your tears!" Leon spit that out angrily and frustrated, and for once Buddy didn't manage to keep his unbothered facade and actually looked hurt and ashamed. Leon sighed, feeling almost guilty now, but what was he supposed to do? Nice manners never worked with the gnome...
"I'm honestly worried, please, what's going on?" he tried to ask once more vehemently. For a long moment between them there was only silence, and Leon was almost actually starting to give up when suddenly, still looking away, in a really low, flat voice, Buddy finally replied.
"...My mom had an aneurysm. She's having surgery now. Doctors don't know if she's gonna make it."
That was heavy. Leon wasn't expecting something like that... actually, Leon just hadn't known what to expect. "I'm sor-" he started but Buddy harshly interrupted "Spare me!" taking advantage of his momentarily surprise to kick him away and move away from him. Why? Why did he always have to be on the defensive? Why did he always have to be so harsh and attack and act like the world was trying to kill him? Why couldn't he just accept that Leon just wanted to help? The only times Leon managed to see Buddy actually honest and submissive, that he managed to make him get rid of all the walls and masks he had built against the world, were the times he fucked him hard. In bed at least the gnome was himself, and he was almost sweet there... But that surely wasn't the time for that. Catching him from his hair before he could leave the bed, Leon asked with a sigh "What's the hospital?"
"What difference does it make?" he hissed annoyedly, making Leon tug at his hair in reply "I'm just trying to help you, gnome. Now answer me." "It's on the other side of the country anyway" he replied even more irked, but this time Leon suspected that it wasn't because of him but just because of how powerless he felt because of the situation.
Right... he remembered his mom lived far away, it was only normal they brought her to an hospital close to where she lived... With a sigh Leon let go of Buddy and gave him his back
"Hop on. You can tell me where she is while we go."
Buddy's expression at Leon's offer was simply priceless: he really never learn to just accept a favour! Even after two years the fact that Leon could be nice to him still left him doubtful, which was funny and kinda cute to Leon.
"Do you prefer me to carry you?" Leon asked, hiding his amusement. Obviously the small threat obtained its immediate result and Buddy quickly approached him, clinging to his back.
By plane, the trip would have taken roughly 5 hours, not to mention the waiting time and the the fact that they would have to move to and from the airport: thanks to Leon's power, they took barely an hour from their house to the reception of the hospital, and that was only cause Leon had to stop often to make sure Buddy could still breath!
When they arrived, Buddy's mom was still under surgery and they had to wait in the waiting room. Leon sat down but Buddy just didn't manage to do so and kept walking up and down the room: that was really unnerving but, seeing the situation, Leon for once wasn't gonna blame the gnome for his attitude.
Now Leon was perfectly aware that Molly wasn't Buddy's real mother, he knew about his fucked up childhood, it hadn't been easy but in time he had managed to make Buddy tell him about his past. It was kinda cute how scared Buddy was to open up, even if he obviously cared for Leon it was evident that trust was another matter completely... and he couldn't say he didn't understand, after knowing what the ginger had been through. And after all that, the fact that in the end he had managed to take that leap of trust kinda flattered Leon.
And now his poor gnome was walking up and down restlessly. After a while leon just couldn't stop himself: he quickly and forcefully took Buddy and made him sit next to him, keeping him in place by placing an arm around his shoulders.
"You're not helping anyone walking like crazy up and down the room. Just wait and relax, the nurse said the operation was going ok..."
As a matter of fact, the nurse had been quite reassuring about Molly's conditions, and even though he could guess that the situation was not easy anyway for Buddy he couldn't really understand why the gnome hadn't calmed down one bit. So many people got similar operations every day, it had been a delicate one but the nurse had been so positive and she surely had no reason to lie...
Why hadn't the gnome calmed down one bit?
"Let go, Leon..." he weakly tried to wriggle away but Leon kept him in place
"What's wrong, gnome? Didn't you listen? The operation's going fine..."
"What if it's my fault?" Buddy suddenly interrupted him, letting now all the worry show on his face "What if they can't fix her?"
Buddy wasn't looking at Leon, but his expression still got to the blonde: he always acted like he cared about nothing, keeping up that unbothered facade... and now... now it was so weird seeing him unable to hide his pain and worry...
Apparently the whole situation was really getting at him, exposing his softer and weaker side...
But why would he worry about such things? Even his power couldn't go that far... could it?
"You can cause aneurysms now?" he asked raising an eyebrow, quite sure he was just exaggerating
"What if her memory cracked?" Buddy insisted, shaking his head at Leon's question "If it collapsed... there is no way to fix it..." he finished in a whisper, a horrified expression on his face.
"...why would that happen?" Leon asked after a moment
"every time I mess with someone's memory... that create something... I don't know but... at some point, when it's too much, you reach a point of no return and... it's like setting a timebomb. Eventually... everything will rot and collapse..."
That was a lot to take in. Leon didn't know what to answer to that. That power of his... Leon never stopped to think about it, but that was scary stuff, and what Buddy had done with it, both in his past and in the current times... well, that was some scary shit! And he knew that Buddy himself had a hard time coping with it...
Buddy hardly mentioned it, but Leon knew how he considered himself a sort of monster because of it, how he hated it and in the same time was addicted to it... he was like a drug addict and his power was his heroine...
"I messed so much with her mind... but I didn't know back then, I had no idea!" Buddy shook his head, being once again on the verge of tears. Instinctively Leon tightened a bit his grip on him, turning his hold on him into a half hug
"Can't you... restore her memories, maybe?" he tried suggesting, but Buddy shook his head
"That would change nothing, once the damage's done it's done..." only after a minute he added in a lower tone "beside, I can't erase the memories I gave her..."
"Why's that?" Leon asked, still keeping Buddy in that half hug since, weirdly enough, Buddy hadn't even tried to wriggle away
"I don't wanna let her go... She's all the family I have, Leon, I can't let her go! I don't wanna be alone..." there was a note of desperation in his voice.
"Buddy..." Leon started but Buddy shook his head interrupting him,
"If something happens to her... it's my fault, it's all my fault..."
Buddy shook his head, fighting back the new tears that threatened to fall down. And then, much to Leon's surprise, he turned toward him and buried his face on his chest, hugging him.
"I can live with all the other shits, I can live with what I did to my parents and with what I'm doing now for Stan, but if something happens to her now..."
Leon didn't worry easy, didn't care about many things, he didn't have Buddy's problems coping with his own actions and usually he would tease the gnome about those moral issues of his. But right now...
He gently caressed his back, having nothing to say that could relief his pain.
His poor gnome... he always acted like such a jerk, like he didn't have a problem in the world and deep down he was nothing more than a lonely little boy, broken beyond fixing...
Before Leon could even try to say something, the nurse from before entered in the room, causing Buddy to jerk up immediately, anxious to know. "How is she?" He asked even before the nurse could start talking. Luckily the girl smiled reassuringly to Buddy "The operation went fine, your mother is now resting in her room, she'll wake up any minute now. You can visit her if you want."
Buddy nodded to her, his expression only slightly relieved from his words: they couldn't talk in front of the nurse, but Leon could guess on his own that Buddy was still worried that the problem was beyond the medical thing, and the only way to know for sure was to check in person.
As the nurse lead Buddy toward Molly's room, Leon, followed them in silence, but when Buddy entered in Molly's room he waited next to the door, being able to check on the gnome but also staying hidden from Molly. He had never met the woman before and, well, that might not be the best moment seeing how the woman didn't need more stress.
As Buddy carefully approached Molly, the woman started waking up and the nurse that had lead him to the room left the room smiling to him. Buddy, though, didn't even bother to smile back to her: he was too tense and too focused on his mother.
As Molly opened his eyes, he carefully moved another step back, holding his breath when she casted him a confused glance. For a split second a thousand doubts crossed his mind: Why was she confused? Did she remember him? He was so scared he didn't even dare to enter yet in her mind...
"Mom?" he asked weakly, his eyes wide open in fear.
Only after a long moment Molly blinked a couple of times and finally replied to him "Buddy? What happened? Where are we?"
Only then he finally stopped holding his breath, breathing relieved and he run to gently and carefully hug her, explaining to her the situation. He even took a peek in her mind, gently and carefully, just to see that everything was in perfect order. She was fine, she was going to be fine!
After just a few minutes the nurse came in and informed him that Molly needed to rest so he left the room, promising his mom that he would call her later. He couldn't stay in town, he had work to do for Stan, but he would make sure she'd receive all the best cures: as he left the room he just nodded to Leon, not stopping to talk to him and walking straight toward the reception instead, where he made sure to warrantee his mom all the best attentions: they didn't come cheap but who cared? He could afford it.
After that he walked outside the hospital, with Leon still following him, still waiting for him to say something... Only once they were outside, moving away from the entrance, just the two of them, Buddy finally turned toward Leon and, much to Leon's surprise (again!), he hugged him tight, burying once again his face in Leon's chest. Leon could feel Buddy's tears wetting his shirt, but he really didn't care, he simply hugged him back, not even talking.
"It wasn't me." Buddy finally spoke up with a shaking, moved voice.
"It wasn't me, her memories are fine, she's fine!"
Leon let him vent, not commenting, not saying anything at all, knowing it was hard already for the gnome as it was. When he was done and he wiped his tears, he helped him to get on his back and they got back home, keeping quiet the whole time.
Now, after opening up so much, Leon wasn't exactly surprised Buddy was starting to close up once again, and that he looked cranky and upset and possibly even ashamed.
Leon decided not to bother him, at least not on the moment. He had opened up quite a lot for his standard, Leon could take some silence now. Still, he didn't expect Buddy to go that far when they reached home: the ginger, in fact, barely got off his back, not even giving him the time to open the door of their apartment before he muttered "I'll sleep at my place tonight..." starting to walk away before Leon even had time to reply.
Was he for real? He hated Stan's place, he couldn't have been happier to leave it, why did he want to go to sleep there now? Why on earth did he want to avoid him?
Well... there was no fucking way he would allow him to do so. He wanted to sleep at Stan's place. Fine. He'd go with him then. Without a word he went after Buddy, following him.
"Go home, Leon." Buddy hissed between gritted teeth, walking a bit faster. Not like that could ever be a problem to Leon...
"I'm coming with you." Leon replied in a tone that didn't allow denials. Buddy frowned, obviously pissed but he didn't say anything else. They kept quiet during the whole path, even when they reached the door and they had to stop while Buddy recovered the keys of the house. As he finally managed to open the door, Buddy slipped inside making sure not to leave room for Leon to get in.
"Go home, Leon. I'll come back tomorrow." He muttered without even looking at him, thing that only managed to piss off Leon, who still, seeing how the day had gone so far, tried his best to stay calm.
"I came this far, I'm not going to leave now." Leon put his hand on the door, keeping it open
"I just need to be alone for a while..."
"No you don't! You're just pissed cause I got to see you weak and emotional and that bothers you, so you're trying to avoid me!" Buddy frowned, shifting uncomfortable from one foot from the other, but Leon didn't stop there "but guess what? That doesn't help. Just grow up, for fuck's sake."
"JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!" Buddy shout out frustrated, trying at that point to slam the door in Leon's face. Well... that wasn't exactly the smartest move: Leon, after all, was far stronger than Buddy. Before the ginger could manage to close the door, Leon slammed it open, bursting in and pinning Buddy against the wall, much to his surprise.
"If I'm not mistaken, you didn't want to be left alone when I actually bothered enough to take you on the other side of the country..."
Leon started talking in a dangerously sweet tone, forcing Buddy to look up at him, and now he could see his lover got quite worried. Good. He had really managed to piss him off good.
"Leon..." he tried to complain or bed weakly, not even daring to wriggle from Leon's grip: Buddy knew that at that point it was better not mess any further with Leon...
"and you didn't want to be left alone when you started trying and I even care enough to stick around for you..." Leon continued in the same tone
"Leon stop..." Buddy's cheeks heated up a bit, he was obviously quite ashamed about what had just happened. Well, Leon wouldn't have rubbed it in his face like that if he hadn't asked for it!
"I didn't even complain when you drenched my shirt with your tears, cause it looked like you needed me and as much as it surprises you every time I do care for you."
"Leon..." Buddy shamefully looked down, weakly freeing himself from Leon's grip on his face
"So, please, tell me again of how you want me to leave you alone." Leon hissed to him, forcing him once again to look up at him.
And then, suddenly, Buddy's look changed: he frowned, looking even more pained, before he shout out against Leon
"WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE? YOU'LL LEAVE EVENTUALLY ANYWAY!"
What... Where did this come from? What was this about? Leon couldn't be more lost! After a moment of silence he managed to speak up again only to ask
"...what?"
"It will happen sooner or later so just... I just need to think, please..."
When and how the discussion had changed? When had he started thinking about that?
"Why would you think I'll leave?" Leon asked in a softer tone, loosening his grip on Buddy, who immediately averted his glance from him and started staring on the ground instead.
"Cause that's how things go. You'll get tired at some point and you'll leave."
Buddy tried to shrug, washing this off, but he just wasn't able to hide how bothered he was at the moment. Putting on his mask once again was quite hard after such a day...
"You might leave too, then..." Leon pointed out. Buddy looked down and didn't reply. He could always act all manly and jerky but he could be so soft deep down... and that silence... seriously? Leon knew him enough to know that that simply meant that Buddy had no intention to leave him. Leon sighed.
"I sticked with you until now... doubt I'm gonna leave so soon" he teased
"Fuck off, Leon..." obviously he wasn't convinced and he didn't really appreciate the teasing. He tried to push Leon away but Leon stayed where he was and pushed him more against the wall
"Why do you think I'll leave you, uh?"
"Cause that's how things go..." he replied vague
"Why?" Leon insisted
"Cause that's how it always goes... people leave..." Stubborn asshole! He was actually managing to make him talk about such uncomfortable subjects!
"You mom stayed" Leon pointed out, but Buddy immediately shook his head
"Cause I forced my mom! You think she has a choice? I manipulated her memories!" From his voice the guilt was, once again, pretty obvious. And still, both Leon and Buddy knew he wasn't going to let her go, that he wouldn't not even if he could... "She stays cause she thinks she wants to but she doesn't have a choice! I just... I'm not going to do this to you..." he concluded in a lower voice, frowning
"Well that's cause you can't-" Leon started, almost laughing, but Buddy interrupted him in a sharp tone
"I can. If I wanted I could find a way and it wouldn't even be hard. I just don't want to..." Leon frowned: could he really? That was... uncomfortable and sweet to know at the same time...
"I'm not going to leave you, Buddy..." he said sweetly after a moment
"Don't say that..." Buddy immediately replied, like that was even painful to hear, but Leon wasn't going to give up.
"Buddy, I'm not-"
"You can't know that! You can't know and... just... you know the 'timebomb' that I told you? That tumor that I create messing with memories? You know how much I messed with my memory? You know what that means? It means that eventually my brain will collapse, I'll be left like my biological parents!"
God, how fucked up was his gnome exactly? He bent down a little, resting his forehead against Buddy's forehead.
"I'm not going to leave you." he repeated slowly
"Stop saying that..."
"I don't care what happens to you, ok? I'm gonna stay..." and he did mean it. After all the gnome couldn't be more annoying with a messed up brain than he was in his normal state...
"No you're not..."
"Yes I am."
"Why?! We are not... married! We are nothing! You don't owe me anything! Why would you stay?"
...married? Leon lifted an eyebrow at the gnome: well... he shouldn't really be surprised... Buddy didn't talk about it often but Leon was aware of Buddy's obsession with the concept of family, and seeing how he had looked for one since he was a child and never managed to actually get one... well, he could understand it. Molly was what he called family, but as sometimes he admitted himself, she was almost more like a prisoner. He had never been wanted, never been chosen...
Actually, the fact that he could think about marriage made a lot of sense...
"You wanna get married?"
"No, I didn't mean..." Oh my God! Was he really blushing now? Leon just couldn't help grinning to him, that was just too funny and he was just too damn cute in that moment!
"Would that prove you I'm not going anywhere?" he asked, lifting his chin with two fingers
"I... I didn't mean it that way..." He didn't say no, though. Which, in other words... meant yes. Bingo.
"Fine, then marry me." Leon said with a cocky grin, still keeping with two fingers
"What?" Buddy's eyes suddenly widened in surprise and disbelief
"Marry me." Leon repeated with that same cocky grin
"Stop mocking m-" Buddy started, immediately getting irked by the thought that Leon was toying with him but Leon didn't even let him finish
"I'm serious. Marry me."
"...you don't even believe in marriage and all that crap..." Buddy stated flatly after a moment, totally bewildered by the whole situation
"I don't." the blonde admitted with a shrug "It's just a piece of paper to me. But if that makes you happy... let's do it. As I said, I'm gonna stay anyway." he concluded with a smirk.
For a long moment Buddy just looked up at Leon in wonder and disbelief, almost in awe. Leon had to fight back not to start chuckling at his cute expression!
And then, suddenly, without any warning, Buddy grabbed Leon's collar, forcing him closer and kissed him with incredible passion but also, weirdly enough for him, with so much sweetness and gentleness.
The both got lost in that kiss and when they broke it they were both breathless, in fact Leon had to recover for a minute or so before he could speak up again
"So... should I take it as a yes?" he asked with a teasing grin
Buddy blushed lightly, but after a short moment he nodded shyly "yes..."
Leon smiled sweetly to him, kissing briefly his lips once again and finally moving away, allowing him to move away from that wall if he wished so.
As Leon gave him his back, Buddy quickly grabbed his shirt, stopping him.
"Leon?"
"Yes?" he replied, turning only lightly his head
"I... thank you..." Buddy replied sheepishly, getting a bit closer and resting his forehead against Leon's back.
Leon shrugged.
"I try to tell you I do care for you, kinda hope one day you'll believe it."
"I love you too..." It wasn't like Leon didn't know that, Buddy didn't say that often, he rarely expressed his feelings but Leon knew anyway and yet... listening it managed to give him a warm sensation to his heart. Quickly he turned around and hugged Buddy.
"I know."
As they broke the hug, Buddy agreed to go back home with Leon. Leon wasn't surprised, after all: Buddy hated that place.
They walked back home together, stopping to a fastfood to have dinner since it was late and neither of them was in the mood for cooking.
That night, when they finally went to bed, weirdly enough Buddy curled up next to Leon.
Now, during his sleep Buddy always reached for Leon, curling up next to him, ending up in Leon's side of the bed, and when Leon teased him about it he always got incredibly pissed, but he always, always went to sleep on his side of the bed, demanding Leon not to even touch him, like that would diminish his 'manliness'.
Well, apparently there was indeed a first for everything...
Leon decided to hold back the teasing and just let Buddy curl up next to him: as much as the ginger was trying to cover it, he was still pretty shaken up by the whole day, and even if he would never admit that... all he sought now was some comfort from Leon.
In the end, they fell asleep with Buddy's head resting on Leon's chest, Leon's arm protectively wrapped around the ginger's back and their legs tangled up together.
The following morning Buddy was back to his usual jerk self, though Leon found out pretty soon that he only needed to mention the marriage-thing to make him blush. Obviously, he didn't lose occasion to tease him mercilessly, until they actually got married just a few weeks later.
