Room C-022: Sharing a moment {TAG Reno}

Tadashi had already come out the room once, rushing toward the bathroom to take two advils and a glass of water for Remi and then back in the bedroom to leave them by the bedside table. After a couple of minutes, though, he was out of the bedroom once again: still that expression of sadness mixed with upset, confusion and fright on his face. He slowly approached Reno by the couch, looking at him only when he stopped by the couch "Ah... Reno... can I... can I sleep here with you?" he stuttered the question before chewing on his lower lip. Whatever the guy would have answered, though, he wouldn't have gone back in the bedroom, he would have rather slept on the floor... but the couch was big enough for the two of them, and he was quite small, he wouldn't take much space...

Reno already knew he wouldn't be getting sleeping that night, again. He really shouldn't be ok with being so used to this, should he..? He sighed, staring blankly up at the ceiling, trying to think about anythníng else that wouldn't happen to remind him of Remi, the girl currently sleeping on his bed. I want to smoke, he thought for what must've been the hundredth time that night.
He had heard his roommate walking in and out of the bedroom, but not payed him any mind, even when he had stopped and stood still right outside the bedroom. But he had not expected for the male to ask him... well, that. He side-glanced up at the smaller male, his expression blank with a hint of disbelief somewhere. Had this been a whole other situation, Reno would've either laughed and made some crude comment and then shoo him away. Or, if he had been drinking, pulled him down under him and done things that would've probably scarred the guy for life.
But instead, he just sighed, to tired to give a shit. And he figured the guy was uncomfortable sleeping in the same room as Remi for the moment. He did look quite shaken up. "Kick me and you'll be sleeping on the floor," he mutterd as he scooted over.

He looked away, feeling even more uncomfortable than he already was as Reno stared blankly at him. After a few seconds he was sure he would have said no... and instead, suddenly, arrived Reno's reply: tadashi stared at him back, wide eyed, before he managed to nod vigorously "I won't move, promise..." he peeped before he curled up next to Reno. Now that was quite weird for him, but it was, after all, quite a weird evening: he had never slept next to another male, though when he slept with his girl friends he always curled up that way, craving for that human contact cause it made him feel protected. Curling up next to Reno was weird... but Remi was drunk, his mom was miles and miles away as well as all his other friends... and he just needed someone in that moment...

"Yeah whatever," the redhead mutterd, going back to staring up up at the ceiling once more. He shot the male another glanced when he felt him curl up, again thinking off a puppy as he watched him. This guy had surely alot of female friends, he thought mildly amused, unable to contain a small chuckle the more he thought about it.
And then he went competly silent, feeling so damn tired bu unable forc ehimself to go to sleep. His brain just wouldn't let him.
"Hey," he mumbled out. "You ok?" Obviously, Tadashi wasn't, Reno wasn't blind. And honestly, the redhead would rather pretend he hand't notice and just focus on his own damn problems.... which he didn't do either. He usally ignored them too. But...
Sigh. Guess he really was growing too soft.

Tadashi made himself comfortable next to Reno, curled up next to him really like a puppy or a kitten would, and then he stayed completely still. He could feel the guy chuckle lightly, but even though he was quite curious he still didn't move and didn't ask. It was like he felt completely spent and strenghtless all of a sudden... He replied at Reno's question only after a little while, and only shaking his head. No, no he wasn't ok. And Reno's jacket still smelled a bit of drunk Remi...

"No of course you're not..." Reno sighed, glancing away from the other again. He closed his eyes, still feeling the faint smell of alcohol on him, and just like his thougths wanderd back to Remi. "You've never done that?" he asked after another short moment of silence. "Drinking yourself stupid to forget that you're hurting." Was he refering to all those depressed people desperetly tryign to numb their pain, or himself? There wans't really a difference there, now was it.

Reno's question made him frown and instinctively he grabbed his jacked, squeezing it a bit in his hands. Drinking to forget the pain... he doubted that could ever work with him. And drinking wasn't a solution. It made you sick, it made you different, it made you hurt the people around you... and there was that revolting smell... only after a moment he replied in a low, flat voice "My biological father was an alcoholic. He beat me and my siblings when he got drunk." he never talked about his biological family, he wasn't sure why he was saying this now to Reno... he didn't say that many details not even to Remi... then why? Maybe he just wanted the red-head to understand... maybe he hoped that talking about it would have prevented the horrible nightmares that night... "I can't stand that smell..." he added, grimacing a bit and closing his eyes

Oh... Reno stayed quiet, not really knowing if he was suppose to say anything to that. He was more than sure this was a topic Tadashi didn't usually bring up, much less even tell others. Espeically to someone like Reno, a guy he barely even knew yet, and who even seemed to frighten him in some way. He frowned, bringing and hand up to rub his his head gently. He didn't balme Tadashi for how he reacted to Remi, and honestly, the guy wouldn't even have needed to tell him why he acted like he did. Reno could relate afterall... Only that instead of resenting the alcohol and avoiding it, he had without hesitation drowned himself in it when life was to much to deal with. And alcohol was far from being the worst things that he's tried out.
"It reeks, I know," he agreed. "Too bad all that shit is addicitng." He shifted then, and suddenly there was a hand ontop of Tadashi's head, patting him gently as if trying to reassure him that everythign would turn out ok.

Tadashi didn't reply anything to his phrase: he didn't really say cause he wanted an answer, there was no answer that would help anyway... But he was glad Reno didn't make fun of him, and that he was actually trying to support him. It wasn't like when he was with Remi or the other girls, they cuddled and spoiled him, this was different, but in that moment... right in that moment, he was glad Reno was there, Reno and nobody else: he didn't want people to ask him questions, he didn't want to be cuddled and smothered, he just wanted to know that there was a friend looking out for him... did that make Reno his friend? If so, he was the first male friend he ever had... as Reno gently patted his head he could feel himself relax a bit, he rubbed ever so slightly against him, making himself more comfortable, and soon he fell asleep...

Reno hadn't expected any sort of reply from the other, in fact, he was kinda glad Tadashi hadn't botherd with it. There was really nothign else say to it. Sadly, the only thin one could wa sjust to accept how life was, and push forward. Deal with it, and focus on the good things you had instead. You can't change the pat afterall, and how frustrating that was when it kept haunting you even after years has passed.
He felt a bit awkward when Tadashi moved even closer ot him, but didn't say or do anythign to push him off. Instead, he just settle dhimself back in the couch, closing his eyes as he finally, finally felt sweet unconsciousness start to pull him in.

Nightmares. Horrible, horrible nightmares kept haunting him. They were memories, but as he remembered, distorted by the view of a scared 4 years old child... that smell, the fear, the pain... It was all so vivid, too vivid, too scary. He was again 4 years old, again with his old family, again at the mercy of that horrible man... And, as all those nightmares ended, it ended with the memory of when his father broke his arm.
Tadashi woke up in the middle of the night, bathed in sweat, gasping for air, with tears running down his cheeks. He was shaking and it took him a moment to remember when he was and what happened. Reno was still sleeping... he didn't want to wake him up... quickly he rushed out of the sofa, his legs shaking, and directed himself toward the bathroom: he tried to clean his face, but now tears just didn't want to stop running down... and he couldn't ask help to Remi, she... she just was in no condition to help... he didn't want to call his parents, they would get worried, and he never liked to talk with them about his biological family, it always felt like admitting they didn't belong together, it hurt... but this... he hadn't had such a vivid nightmare in years and he couldn't manage to calm down, nor to breath normally...

Reno stirred in his sleep, not completely asleep but not quite awake either it. However, the moment Tadashi had pushed himself away from couch, his eyes opened, immediately taking notice of the now empty space beside him. To many disbelief, Reno wasn't a heavy sleeper, only on the few occasion he was lucky. Now wasn't one of those times however. Sitting up, his eyes tireadly trailed over towards the bathroom, the light seeping thruhg under the door catching his attention. Shaking his head a bit to clear his own mind off the sleep, he pushed himself up to his feet and headed towards the bathroom. As he passed the bedroom, he cast the door a quick glance, halting for a short moment, before continuing. It's not that he needed to sue the bathroom himself, but he had this uneasy feeling that his roommate was still a bit shaken up.
"Hey..." he began as he pushed open the door, squinting his eyes due to the light still being a bit to bright for him. But that still hadn't been enough for him to miss the tears currently pouring down Tadashi's face. "Whoa, hey. What's wrong?" he asked, walking up to the smaller male. Reaching a hand out, he hesitated for a couple of seoncds, before gently placing it on Tadashi's shoulder, in what he hoped was a comforting manner. "You uh... had a bad dream?"

Tadashi was so taken by his own emotions he didn't even hear Reno's movements from the other room, he only noticed him when he started entering: he tried to quit with the sobs and to wipe away the tears, but it was pointless. He could still barely breath, and the tears just didn't want to stop falling... As Reno asked him what was wrong he wanted to reply, he tried to speak up but between the sobs he just didn't manage to talk and gave up. He only nodded ever so lightly at his last question... a bad dream... that didn't even start to describe it... he wanted to say something, to do something, but he was numb and dizzy and he just didn't manage to do or say anything, just stand there like an idiot while big tears run down his cheeks...

Reno's expression turned into a small frown at this, not needing to ask anything else to understand. Somehow, he could just tell it had been more than just nightmares that shakend up the male. Reno, reluctantly, recognised that look a bit to well. How many times had he not woken up like this himself, terrified and chocking on his own tears, before the past memories left him feeling nothing but numb?
He sighed, scratching his neck and said nothing. He wasn't gonna try and reassure the male that 'everything was ok', when he didn't even know the guy's whole story to begin with. And besides, how many times ahd the guy been made to hear those words? It would've for sure sounded false and hollow if Reno had botherd to mutter them out. The redhead sure as hell was sick if hearing them.
"Come on," he mumbled, giving Tadashi's shoulder a soft squeeze before gently leadiing him out of the bathroom, and back to the couch.

Tadashi reluctantly followed him out of the bathroom, trying to contain the sobs but really to no use. As they got back toward the couch though, he stopped before he would sit down: he just couldn't go back to sleep, back to more nightmares, he just couldn't... And he thought he had managed to leave that in the past, finally for years he had been able not to have such dreams, not to revive those memories... could he ever really run away from his past? He felt desperate...
Slowly he turned toward Reno and approached him once again: he could have left if he wanted to, he could just leave him there, though Tadashi really hoped he wouldn't: solitude now scared him more than anything, when he was alone it was harder to keep in mind that the past was just the past and that it couldn't hurt him anymore.
Tadashi slowly got closer to Reno and rested his head on the guy's chest: he just needed human contact, he needed to feel he was not alone... maybe he even needed to vent a bit, but he wouldn't know where to start, not even now that sobs finally started to get less intense and painful...

Obviously, the guy wouldn't want to go back to sleep, not yet at least. So Reno didn't rush Tadashi to sit back down on the couch, allowing him to take his time. And since he was too awake to go back to sleep himself, Reno was just about to turn and walk out of the room. Only to halt in his tracks as Tadashi suddenly blovked his way, leaving the redhead a bit speechless as he rested his agaisnt his chest. Reno felt at loss in what to do, his first thought being of shoving the male off and then proceed in walking out of the room. He wasn't a god damn nanny. And he had not enjoy being one for Remi and Hiro either.
Reno frowned, staring blankly down at the smaller male currently using him as some sort of crutch to lean on. Groaning to himself in defeat, he moved his arm and pulled Tadashi into a hug, ignoring the awkward feeling. "And this is why I'm never having kids," he half-joked, tyring to lighten up the mood a bit, even if he was stating this more to himself than Tadashi. "Come one sit down would ya? I ain't gonna leave," he mutterd, gently pulling them both down to sit on the couch, Reno keeping one arm wrapped around Tadashi's shoulder.

"S-sorry..." Tadashi finally managed to mutter between the sobs when Reno complained: he realised he was being annoying, he wasn't blind, but he couldn't help, he didn't want to stay alone... And he was thankful when Reno hugged him, thing that made him feel allowed to cling to him like he would have done with any of his female friends. He just nodded when Reno suggested to go back to the couch, thankful once again that Reno wasn't going to leave him. Still clinging to Reno, Tadashi sat down next to him on the sofa, finally starting to contain the sobs. "D-do you k-know what it feels l-like, t-to be haunted by memories... t-thinking you managed to g-g-get o-over them and t-then... having the s-same nightmares a-gain..." it felt like there was no escape...

Again Reno took his time before replying, just litsening to Tadashi's quiet sobs, feeling less awkwards by the minute. And then he couldn't help but let out a short laugh at what the other said. It wasn't mokcing and held no spite in it, just a tired, hollowed sound. "Yeah, I do sadly," he snotred, leaning his head back against the cushions. "...feels like there's no escape right," he went on after a moment, not really asking that but made it sound more like a statement. Sighing, he moved one hand up to run down over his face, a dry smirk now plastered on his face. "You'll never recover from it, not really. It'll sitll be stuck there somewhere in back of your mind, making you relive those things you're so desperetly wish to forget. But hey...." Reno glanced up at Tadashi, giving his shoulder another pat. "That's just part of life, all we can do is suck it up and deal with it."

Tadashi just kept clinging to Reno: his laugh didn't offend him, somehow he got he wasn't laughing of him. His words, on the other hand... he could feel that Reno had gone through something similar too. Not a similar experience as his, just having a hurtful past, a past one would wish to forget, a past that haunts you and hurts you... It was possibly this feeling that made Tadashi want to talk, mixed with the fact that he needed to, he needed to vent... He already told Reno his his biological father was an alcoholic, so he didn't have to explain that again "It's always the same nightmare... it's mixed memories of when my biological father hit me and my biological mother stood there and did nothing... I wake up when my biological father breaks my harm, and I can still feel the pain... I was 4 and it still haunts me..." tadashi hid a bit more his face on Reno's chest before he continued in a plea "Please tell me it's ok..." Tell me it's going to be fine, tell me he can't hurt me anymore... he just needed to hear those words, no matter how much of a lie they could be...

Reno just sat quiet, allowing the other male to vent and just throw out whatever was haunting him. Again, he was turned on between what to do. He wanted to stop giving a crap and just leave, it was none of Reno business after all. and at the same time, he knew he'd hate himself if he left the smaller male like this, crying and frightened, just looking for some sort of comfort and reassurance that the past couldn't hurt him anymore. Reno knew all to damn well what that felt like... And frankly, dealing with someone in this state wasn't a first for him. Hiro has ahd his fair share of night terrors keeping them both up, even if the brat tried to deny the fact.
For fuck's sake, he mentally scolded himself, the arm that was still lazily wrapped over Tadashi's shulder shifting a bit. "You're safe here, puppy."
There was no hint of annoyance or false promises in his sentence. Only speaking the truth. "He can't get to you here, nor would he know how to find you," he went on ina firm, yet soft and gentle way, patting him on the head as if he as a child almost. "It's ok, you're alright." And Reno only said this beaucse he knew it was ture himself.

Those words really seemed to work on Tadashi, as his body, which had been so tensed up until a minute before, started relaxing a bit. It didn't matter if to someone else sounded stupid, psychologically having someone else saying those words out loud felt more real than trying to say those himself. He was safe, he was alright, he was where he couldn't be hurt by them anymore... The sobs, that had already started to become less frequent, finally died down, allowing him to breath more normally. And now that he wasn't shaken by sobs anymore, Tadashi realised he was totally strenghtless, dead tired. Tears kept running down his cheeks, but he couldn't help it, they would stop as well eventually... he just felt sorry and ashamed for wetting Reno's jacket with his tears. He wanted to say he was sorry, but he couldn't say the word and soon he was once again asleep, even though his expression wasn't really relaxed, he was at least calmer than before...

After a moment of just litseing to the other's calmed down breathing, genuily happy for the younger being bale to fall back asleep without more terrors haunting him. At least for now. Glancing down at Tadashi, who was still using him as some sort of body pillow, Reno gently pushed him off and laid him gently down on the couch, making sure he was comfortable enough much like he ahd done with Remi, before standing up.
Glancing back at the door to their bedroom, he sighed, sounding more frustrated than tired at this point. No sleep for the wicked, huh, he thought to himself with a dry smile, and silently left the room.